Wednesday, May 7, 2008

Bad Movies

Ashton

I like bad movies. I do. I didn't fully grasp this until recently. Barry sent me an email about a week ago bitching about a commercial he saw for the new Ashton Kutcher movie and how this guy can still be employed. I responded that he was insane. Any movie that has a trailer with a guy pissing on dishes is going to be funny. I think we fought for a while about it but, end result, I accepted the fact that I like bad movies and I really didn't have a leg to stand on.

Funny bad movies at least. I don't understand it. Maybe what Holden in 'Chasing Amy' said is right, 'The real money is in dick and fart jokes'. I don't know if thats true or not, but if you make a stupid movie, with sight gags, minimal plot, and throw in some gratitious nudity....I'm watching it.

Recently, I was flipping channels. I came across "Little Man", I'm fairly certain that this movie didn't make any top ten lists the year it came out. Yet, there is a scene in the movie where the 'baby' (a midget that noone has figured out isn't a toddler..fucking stupid, right?????) banged his foster mom when she was sleeping. I laughed. out loud. It was embarrassing. But it was funny. It also had Tracey Jordan in it..and he is awesome.

Another one that I stumbled upon...The Larry the Cable Guy movie. I didn't see the entire movie but I flipped on during a point when he had the shits and there was a scene of him blast testing a toilet....It was fantastic. I lasted 30 minutes. I would have watched the entire thing if my wife didn't walk in and demand I take an IQ test. She hates me.

Anyway, between Barry breaking my balls about Ashton, The cable guy movie, and Little Man, I don't think there is any hiding it. I love a bad movie. Is that wrong? I don't know. Does it make me a bad person that I don't feel the need to 'learn' something from everything I watch? I don't think I care.

So, I'm calling for it...I know we have at least a few people that check this site on occasion...raise you flag!!!! What stupid movie do you love?

Here are a few of mine:
1. Dude? Where's my car?
2. Little Man
3. Larry The Cable Guy
4. National Lampoon Movies (that have been made in the last 6-8 years)
5. Bio Dome

Tuesday, May 6, 2008

The WO Poll - May 08

There comes a time... When we heed a certain call...
This month that call is the May 2008 edition of The WO Poll. No we weren't lazy in April. Things got written and never posted. Articles were started and never finished. Ideas were thought of but never put to paper. Life gets in the way sometimes. This month will be different. We promise... Without further ado... THE WO POLL

1. (1)Kristen Bell - Forgetting Sarah Marshall has hit the ground running. The WO can not get enough of Kristen Bell. It’s been said before, and I have a feeling it will be said many more times…. early candidate for WO Woman of the Year.













2. (3) Jennifer Love Hewitt - JLH elbows her way back up to the number two spot. Besides looking extremely hot in Ghost Whisperer, she graces the cover of the May 5-11 2008 issue of TV Guide, dubbed “The Sexiest Woman on TV.” Who are we at The WO to disagree with that?













3. (4) Katherine Heigl - One of the few good things to ever come out of DC. Obama, Clinton and McCain got nothing on her body. Vote Heigl in 08. And yes. I will turn in my man card for watching 27 Dresses with the girlfriend.








4. (2) Elisha Cuthbert - Elisha takes a two spot dive. Why? Poor judgment. Maybe some of us at the WO were a little oblivious to the fact that she dated NHL embarrassment Sean Avery. (Get well soon Sean, but we still don’t like you.) I’m sure she’ll be forgiven soon enough. We’ll get over the initial shock.










5. (9) Megan Fox - Making a huge jump back up the list. WO headquarters took notice when FHM said she was the hottest girl in the world. Maybe she’s not number one on our poll, but yes… we took notice. Proving once again that visibility can really help you out on the poll.













6. (NR) Olivia Munn - The only newcomer to the poll this month, Olivia debuts at number six. A certain WO writer has been watching far too much G4 lately. If that wasn’t enough, he has started to force his opinion on others. Munn brings the funny daily, and like KBell, has worn Leia’s metal bikini in the past. Nice.











7. (5) Keira Knightley - Keira takes a slight slide this month, mainly due to lack of exposure. With a handful of movies in post-production, I’m sure she won’t slide too far. If she does? You can count on her coming back with a vengeance.










8. (6) Mandy Moore - Mandy drops two more places this week. Where have you gone? Hello? Mandy?














9. (8) Vida Guerra - Vida drops a spot. This girl needs exposure. Yes I know people know who she is. Yes I understand that she’s smokin’. The WO still wants to see more of her, and I don’t mean just skin.





10. (10) Gracyanne Barbosa - Remaining in the final spot for the second month running, we find Barbosa fighting to keep herself on the Poll. I wish I had something more to write about her, but the Poll needs to be posted. I just don’t have time to make a certain WO staffer write something up.














That’s the poll this month. With Heroes still missing, Hayden Panettiere becomes the only lovely lady dropped this month. Don’t think we won’t miss her. She is still making a push on the bubble. Joining her this month in "bubble land" is Blake Lively making moves to get back on the poll, and Mila Kunis who just seems to be everywhere lately. G4’s Kristin Holt and still pregnant (as far as I know) Jessica Alba round it all out. Hah. Sometimes I even amuse myself. I just can't wait until the June edition. See you next time.

~Barry

Questions? Comments? We can always be reached at worthlessops@gmail.com