Wednesday, January 2, 2008

Best Monkeys in TV/Movie History

So it's a new year already. The good ol' '08. What better way to look forward to the future, than to study the past. Yes Master Yoda, I remember what you taught me.

"All his life has he looked away... to the future, to the horizon. Never his mind on where he was. Hmm? What he was doing. Hmph. Adventure. Heh. Excitement. Heh. A Jedi craves not these things. You are reckless.

But forgetting the sage like advice from one of the greatest teachers, (Yes I am a geek... but from what I hear that's chic now) we do look to the future. And that brings me back to the past. On January 11th, 2007, Buford produced a blog that made all of us at WO Headquarters very proud.

With that.... I bring you his article, "The Best Monkeys in TV/Movie History."


The Best Monkeys in TV/Movie History
(Originally posted: Jan 11, 2007)

After watching a commercial for Trunk Monkeys (which are awesome and everyone should watch), I was sitting around thinking about how great monkeys have been in the movie industry. Pretty much every time a monkey is in a movie or on screen, you are going to stop and watch; because, monkeys are fantastic and always food for a laugh. So, I sat there and thought about monkeys. And monkeys in movies and television. And monkeys that I have never forgot. Monkeys are awesome. And here is a list of my favorite monkeys.

Clyde (Any Which Way But Loose)

He was also in the sequel, but I don't think I really liked the sequel as much. I like CLYDE in the sequel, but the movie?? Eh. Actually, I liked Philo fighting the guy he had befriended, and I liked how excited that guy was when he broke Philo's arm, only to get his ass kicked anyway. Ok, I liked that movie too... the Any Which Way series rocked. Now, onto Clyde; Clyde could take cars apart, drink beer, and liked to get his groove on. He also was an excellent bodyguard, and had a fantastic smile. This movie also stars Clint Eastwood. Clint Eastwood and a monkey, I'm going to watch that every time.

Marcel (Friends)

I never really liked Marcel. I actually hate spider monkeys... because they aren't real monkeys. Well, at least they aren't like good monkeys that you could train to use the bathroom or sit in a bar with. They are pretty much the 'pet' of the monkey world, and I like my monkeys to be more of a friend than a pet. Is that wrong? I don't know, but that is my criteria.

Anyway, Marcel roped me in during one episode of Friends where they were over at Ross' apartment, and Marcel kept playing "The Lion Sleeps Tonight" over and over again while dancing on a chair. After much complaining from the group, Ross goes over and turns the stereo off. Marcel then gets down from his perch and runs off into the bedroom; where he proceeds to slam the door. It was brilliant. Granted, the monkey had very little to do with this, as I'm sure some PA slammed the door. None the less, the effect was awesome. Marcel gained a lifetime pass, and entry into my monkey list from that one episode. I enjoyed his later work, when he dressed up as a ballerina, and took a dump in Rachel's shoe as well. Marcel barely makes the list, but he earned his spot.

Virgil (Project X)

Virgil... ahhhh, Virgil. This movie made me cry. (-ed. It made Barry cry as well) Matthew Broderick did this movie when he was still on the heels of Ferris Bueller, and he smoked Marlboro Reds too. You can't smoke Reds in a family friendly film these days, but Ferris did... and Ferris was awesome.

This also starred a pre-Mad About You Helen Hunt. This also makes her pre-Oscar and in turn, pre-bitch. She pretty much just had Tami Maida as the Quarterback Princess on her resume at the time this movie was filmed. So, she was humble, and only slightly bitchy. I am still mad that she left Hank Azaria. F-ing bitch.

Anyway, Virgil was a monkey that Helen Hunt taught sign language, and many other things. He was a very bright and wicked cute little guy that lived life like a child, and Helen was his mom. Until funding dried up on her stupid little experiments, that is. Helen didn't have the money to buy the monkey outright from the school, so she was told he was being sent to a zoo. Turns out the zoo means sent to the Air Force for a top secret mission. Anyway, because Virgil is so smart he is like the superstar of the training class.

This class also includes Goofy and Goliath. Two of the most underrated monkeys ever to grace the silver screen. Goliath is an old monkey that was brought in from a circus. He is grumpy, and smokes. Goofy, is just the house retard... but, cute. So yeah, the house retard. Anyway, turns out that the training they are doing is just simulations to see how long a pilot can continue to fly an airplane after being exposed to a nuclear blast and the ensuing radiation. Virgil and most of the monkeys get away at the end, Goliath saves the day in one of the most brutal death scenes ever filmed, and all is well in the land. I haven't seen this movie in about 15 years, and I can still remember everything. In particular, how awesome Virgil was when he signed for an apple.


What are some other monkeys that were great in movies and television? I feel remiss to not add Bear from BJ and the Bear, but that show was long ago, and I find that even mentioning it nowadays is usually met with blank stares.

Who are your favorite monkeys? And seriously, is there actually anyone in the world that does NOT like monkeys?

Back when this was originally posted we did get some replys. Our good friend Tracey brought up Lancelot Link. WO staffer, Speed, also brought to our attention that Marcel is also the rally monkey, and for that reason alone he should be dropped from the list. Now we solicit more responses.

Beyond that? have a great day.

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